Soundscape #13: In The Cold I'm Standing (Where Is Your Happy Place?)

Georges Seurat. Railway Tracks, 1881.

Everyone has somewhere safe and reassuring to which they can retreat from the world and be alone with themselves. The lucky ones have an actual physical place while the rest of us have to rely on our memories or imaginations.

Whenever I'm stressed or trying to fall asleep, I shut my eyes to go back to my friend's backyard in Manchester. I was staying with her last year and it was really cold, especially in the mornings. I remember my insides shaking like crazy even before I get up. I remember literally hopping around the kitchen freezing to death, while waiting what seemed like forever for the water to boil. But with a mug of steaming hot tea and a cigarette, I would huddle outside on the step to the backyard to smoke while waiting for the tea to cool and wondering what new things and new places to check out later. One morning, as I was stoning out and watching the light blue sky, it occured to me that the telephone/cable poles along the street were positioned in such a way that they seemed to be propping up the sky. One by one in equal distance from one another, each silently braving the cold bitter wind stoically doing its job. Maybe it only seemed that way from where I was sitting, or maybe I was just delirious from the cold.

Stupid as it may sound, I love the cold. Even when my insides were freezing and the tea was taking forever to course through my body; even when my fingers were shaking as I tried to smoke the first cigarette of the day, hell, even when I couldn't feel my fingers shaking... it's invigorating. I feel more awake, more aware, more alive somehow in the cold.



Track Listing:
1. (0:00) Sigur Rós - Untitled #3 (Buy ())
2. (6:27) Explosions In The Sky - Your Hands In Mine (w/strings) (Buy Friday Night Lights OST)
3. (10:37) As The Poets Affirm - Snow White Wings In The Bottomless Blue (Buy The Jaws That Bite, The Claws That Catch)
4. (16:34) Mono - Halo (Buy One Step More And You Die)
5. (24:08) Godspeed You! Black Emperor - Hung Over As The Queen At Maida Vale (John Peel Sessions)
6. (42:31) My Dad Vs Yours - Canyons (Grand Or Otherwise) (Buy Winning Hearts And Minds)
7. (46:10) Mogwai - 2 Rights Make 1 Wrong (Buy Rock Action)
8. (55:43) When They Know You They Will Run - December (Demo)